Does this popular dating advice actually apply, or is it a toxic mindset?

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Lately, I’ve been seeing the same dating advice pop up on social media platforms: if they wanted to, they would.

The phrase is usually said in response to someone complaining about a crush that never texts back, or a partner who never seems to put in the effort.

Sometimes, women even use the phrase to show off all the romantic things their partner did want to do for them.

The concept is simple: if they wanted to text back, they would. If they wanted to put in the effort to see you or talk to you, they would.

As easy as the message is to decode, a lot of people have mixed feelings about the phrase. Plenty of people have made it their mantra, but others feel like this dating advice is toxic — and oversimplifies how people and emotions work. …

Especially in a world where people aren’t afraid to push your personal boundaries

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Trigger Warning: Sexual coercive behavior is described in detail. Fearless community, please read with care.

He was nothing like his pictures. He was several inches shorter than his profile said he’d be and skinnier than he’d looked in most of his selfies. Had I been a little more self-assured, I would’ve drummed up an excuse to leave the moment he opened the door.

But I was eighteen, barely out of high school, and way too nice. He was twenty-four, studying for his master’s, and had no problem coming up with excuses.

He was from Tinder — I can’t remember how long we’d been talking for, only a couple of days. On the phone, he sounded like a sympathetic character: he was tired of having hookups, he was just looking for the right girl, he just wanted something real. …

Ben Shapiro’s commentary on Cardi B’s latest single is more than just a cringy, viral moment

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Source: Forbes

If you’re familiar with conservative speakers, you’ve probably heard of Ben Shapiro. He’s particularly famous for lecturing college students and engaging in spirited debates about all the heavy-hitting topics: abortion, climate change, and feminism.

Most recently, he’s been trending on Twitter for his commentary about Cardi B’s latest single, “WAP.” That acronym stands for “Wet Ass Pussy” — which is exactly what the song is about.

In a clip that went viral on Twitter, Ben Shapiro awkwardly recites the lyrics to WAP, but says “P-word” instead of “pussy.” In the video, he mocks the song, saying, “This is what feminists fought for. This is what the feminist movement is all about…it’s not really about women being treated as independent, full, rounded human beings. …

The reason why so many “karens” won’t cover up goes deeper than entitlement

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I’ve always known people were ridiculous, but it took a global pandemic for me to realize how much. Hundreds, sometimes thousands of people, are dying each day, and there’s no real cure. All you can do is try not to get it, and hope that your immune system is strong enough to hold out if you do get it.

I think it’s safe to say one of our biggest defenses against the spread of COVID-19 is masks. Wear a cloth mask out in public, and you protect other people from catching the virus from you.

It’s not a tall order — I’d rank it up there with covering your cough or not sneezing on people. …

Four harmful tropes I wouldn’t mind never seeing again

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Unsplash

I’ve previously written about the problematic female and male tropes that plague modern-day movies and TV shows, but these aren’t the only people who get a bad rap. There are a lot of other marginalized groups that get an unfair portrayal in the media — especially the LGBTQ+ community. Here are five problematic LGBTQ tropes that Hollywood needs to throw in the garbage:

1. “The Gay Best Friend”

The GBF is one of those tropes that isn’t just tired — it’s exhausted. From Stanford Blatch’s character on Sex and the City to Kurt Hummel on Glee, we’ve been watching gay men take the backseat to their white female friends for decades. …

This polish erotica seems to fail on every single front

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Source: Fox News

If someone told me that 365 Days (or 365 DNI) was a fanfiction written by a fourteen-year-old, I wouldn’t be surprised. One of my friends described it as a “worse Fifty Shades of Grey,” and somehow, it still failed to meet my expectations. I have a soft spot for bad movies, but it’s not very often I encounter a movie that manages to fail at everything.

If you haven’t seen the film yet (and I’m not sure I recommend it), here’s a basic rundown of the plot: a Polish woman, Laura, goes on vacation with her boyfriend. While she’s there, she gets kidnapped by the head of the Silician mafia, Massimo. He caught one glimpse of her five years ago and has been enamored since. Now that he has her in his grip, Massimo offers Laura a proposal: she has 365 days to fall in love with him, and if she doesn’t, he’ll let her go. …

As a white ally, I don’t want to hog the mic — I want to pass it

For the past few days, I’ve been scrambling for the right words in the aftermath of George Floyd’s death. I’m not the only one — plenty of Medium bloggers have taken to their keyboards to sum up their outrage in five-minute reads.

That’s what I planned to do too — but I’ve also been thinking about my role as a white ally. My job isn't to ignore the problem because it’s “not my fight,” but it’s also not my responsibility to speak for POC.

In times like this, when racial injustice is more apparent than ever, I don’t want to be another white voice hogging the mic. I’ve had the mic my entire life. Instead, I want to help pass the mic — below, I’ve compiled a short list of recent Medium posts about racial injustice written by POC. Each of these articles have taught me something, and I consider them to be must-reads — especially for other white allies that may be scrambling for their own…

To the Reddit post that got underneath my skin

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Pixabay

Almost two weeks ago, a father posted on the subreddit, AmItheAsshole, about deleting a Minecraft world his son had built as punishment. As the name suggests, this subreddit is all about helping people gain a little bit of perspective. If they aren’t sure whether they did something wrong or not, they’ll ask internet strangers what they think.

In this case, this father wanted to know if he was wrong for deleting his son’s Minecraft world. Here’s the full post:

I have 2 children, a 9 year old son and a 6 year old daughter. My son had a Minecraft world where he built quite an impressive castle on an island, which he was very proud to show to me. …

The controversy surrounding Adele’s weight loss is creating a bigger discussion

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The Independent

A couple of days ago, Adele generated a lot of commotion online when she posted birthday photos of herself in quarantine. In her post, she’s rockin’ a black mini-dress and she’s noticeably smaller than she was a year ago.

The comments immediately flooded in — along with other celebrities gushing over her weight loss, and how well her “post-divorce bod” looks. Amidst all the praise, some people had concerns about the emphasis placed on Adele’s weight loss.

One Twitter user wrote: “Please stop saying Adele had a ‘glow up’ we have no idea what her health was/is like and this is just reinforcing the ‘skinny ideal’ or the concept that the skinnier you get the prettier you get.” …

About

Lindy

When I’m not writing, you can usually find me hanging out with my cats. pricelindy@gmail.com

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